I skipped over “enemy” and got really excited for a second
Haha, I just read “Putin enemy” and it kind of gave away the ending
You and me both, friend 😞
Me too friend, me too.
Trump ₑₙₑₘᵧ dies suddenly
Oof, so close!
At first I read “Putin died” and I cannot even begin to describe the emotions going through me while I checked the sub name, before realizing I missed a word.
An interesting thought for sure, a thought about preparing for winter with, eh, expected uncertainty and fuel crisis started to form in my head. Like framing the balconies and additionally insulating old balcony doors and such stuff. Not even speaking about a reserve of matches, salt, sugar, canned meat and such.
Friends say he passed away at home after eating mushrooms he found in the yard of his home.
Though he was a mushroom expert, the mushrooms he collected turned out to be poisonous.
When I become a political speaker I’m going to make my hobbies piano moving, snake catching, deep sea fishing, and free climbing.
…the mushrooms he saw in the yard of his home, right before diving from the fifth floor window in his excitement to pick them up and being almost saved by a passer-by, helpfully trying to slow his fall by shooting a few bullets up at him
All while having his hands and legs bound with rope. Making Houdini proud.
Don’t forget BASE jumping.
High rise window cleaner.
Boiler repair on oil rigs on the weekend?
A Russian coworker once lamented that he couldn’t collect mushrooms in our area since he was not familiar with them like back home. Guess it’s not an unusual thing to do in Russia.
Friends say he passed away at home after eating mushrooms he found in the yard of his home.
Though he was a mushroom expert, the mushrooms he collected turned out to be poisonous.
This is such a "wink, wink " to readers if I ever see one
If an Amanita, they are universally known amongst mushroom experts and even just foragers, never trust any white mushrooms with their look. There is a very low chance he wasn’t poisoned.
Must have lived in a bungalow
He’s not the first Putin enemy to die from accidental mushroom poisoning. Look up the scientist Vitaly Melnikov.
There is an interesting podcast called Sad Oligarchs that document alot of these sort of deaths in Russia.
When talking about the alot of accidental poisonings, accidental drops from very high buildings, and suicides by two bullets to the back of the head, I always imagine an alot with the face of Putin.
Reference, with image of standard alot: https://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/04/alot-is-better-than-you-at-everything.html?m=1
If you need an army of assassins, I’ll allot a lot of alots to you.
Looks like they are running out of windows
“Let’s see them throw me out a window now! I’ll never set foot inside a building with a window ever again. I’m just going to live a simple life outdoors with my mushrooms. They’re the only thing that brings me joy anymore.”
His enemies have started to avoid Windows and BUM, a new method. Putin is an inventive killer. Unlike Netanyahu who just kills en masse.
Did they run out of windows already?
While falling out of a window.
After shooting themself in the back of the head 5 times
Perhaps he lives in a single-story building, so defenestration might take some time.
What? So, the 6th floor, toss out the window, is abandoned.
At this point I think anyone important in Russia is staying on the ground floor at all times! Bungalows only!
There wasn’t any hot polonium in his area
Intern: But comrade doctor, the man was obviously shot!
Comrade Doctor: Not so comrade, the mushrooms simply happened to be 9mm lead and thus he can reasonably have been said to have died of lead mushroom poisoning.
Accidental is the keyword.
α-Amanitin. Amanita looks edible. Common way to die. Also a very easy cover-up if they enjoy foraging for food. A lot of species are foragable, but a lot are also deadly and hard to differentiate. Definitely sus, but I wouldn’t be surprised if this guy ate something similar to a death cap.
