What is the reverse of eating the onion? I thought it was satire the entire article and kept waiting for the piece that made it clear it was a joke to allow for the laugh, I’m at the uncomfortable stage of thinking this is legitimate.

If Allbirds (referenced in the article) is an example of a PE-led company being made to pivot from a product manufacturer to data goldrush bandwagoneering, this has to be the home-baked budget version.

It’s so… 1980s electronic tat for kids by comparison. As if the Amazon Alexa inventor and Fisher Price had a baby while they were both unemployed. So bizarre.

Basically just a voice recorder with no connection, and you have to get your files through usb and submit them yourself to the pasta sauce site so they can send them to the library of congress for “preservation” or something.

Such a weird concept I can barely imagine someone doing that seriously. As a joke, maybe with your worst Mario impression cut by exaggerated slurping sounds, maybe.

c/NotTheOnion